http://.femdommesociety.com - Domina DeManda, FemDomme Domme in the Female Domination Lifestyle

My Interests

If you are looking for me to consider you as a sub, slave or bottom... be very clear that I am extremely picky and may not be the kind of dominant and sadist that would be a good fit for you. Make no assumptions. I'm not your Mistress unless I have formally taken you on for training or own you. In order for you to get a better understanding of the form of lifestyle relationship that I am open to exploring, please read "Looking for potential and possibilities in a "seeker" and MY EXTENDED PROFILE that are provided below below and BEFORE contacting me with your thorough and detailed introduction with request for my consideration. Otherwise, you will not get any reply. Thank you.

So, Who is Domina DeManda?

You'll find that I strive to LIVE ALOHA in the best ways that I can and with roots based on my ethnicity as Chinese, Hawaiian, Irish, English, Scottish and Cherokee. I am a mother who is deeply proud of her children, husband, family, heritage, cultures, and spirituality, as well as lifestyle and living choices.

Born in the San Francisco Bay Area and raised by an Irish, English, Scottish and Cherokee Father and Chinese and Hawaiian mother between homes in Northern California, Nevada and Hawaii, I'm a moderate to extreme Sadist who is Dominant (not domineering), Assertive (not aggressive nor abusive), Nurturing (not smothering) and Open-Minded (not naive). My "vanilla" career has allowed me to travel extensively and live all over the US, as well as in Australia and Germany, settling in 1999 in Southeast Florida.

My sensual/sexual triggers get tripped when I can create and orchestrate arousing erotic art, sensual experiences and erotic adventures that can make reality far better than any fantasy. I love having someone who is an open-minded and willing individual as my sensual and sexual subject and partner, while tantalizing and teasing the entirety of their body, mind and spirit. I get charged when I embrace someone whom I care about in erotic rope bondage and/or suspension (among assorted other sadistic fetishes and kinks) while having "my way" (as pre-negotiated) with them. Certainly, I like to enjoy the mutual satisfaction of a kinky escapade to the fullest extent possible.

There's no question, I'm twisted, kinky and proud of it! I may even play from time to time with a masochist bottom or switch (whether submissive or not and whether male or female) whom I share strong energy with. However, I am not nor will I ever be a Service Top - with the exception of for educational purposes.

I strive to be cautious and considerate of everything and all involved. Although I have made mistakes to give people the benefit of the doubt too quickly, overall, I am trusting but selective about the choices that I may make and whom I may forge a friendship or considering for more. I have learned from my mistakes and endured some very hard lessons to reach the point where I am now. Given that fact, I know that I am now even more selective and far less easily trusting of someone through only their words or what acting that they can do to get what they want, without a lot of earnest intention, effort or desire to back those words or acting up, let alone earnest intention to fully experience the submissive, slave or property role they have said they really wanted.

Within the scope of alternative lifestyles, by nature, I identify most as a Leather Woman who is Dominant Sadist. I began my journey through my gay leather roommate, Michael, and forged the foundation of my Leather Roots in San Francisco back in 1984 that has evolved to how I live and love today. Over the years, I happily surprised myself as I have "grown up" and, since 1998, have also evolved to become a Dominant/Switch as a devoted slave, masochist, wench, property and wife ONLY to my beloved Owner, Master, Dominant, Sadist, Daddy and Husband, ShamanAKADaddyJeff, who founded the House of Shaman (our household).

Daddy Jeff is my primary partner and the individual who totally and completely knows, accepts and supports me, as well as the fact that I am Dominant Sadist and Goddess type to the select and rare submissive jewels of my choosing (and with his approval). I appreciate that Daddy Jeff encourages me to have "My pets" and am secure in knowing that he understands that I shall have only one Owner, Master, Dominant, Sadist, Daddy and Husband in him. He is the true love of my life and soul mate, being the most honorable, strong and nurturing individual whom I have ever had the good fortune to meet. We have a polyamorous relationship and household rooted in leather lifestyle traditions, as well as Master/slave (D/s) modalities. We are not strictly formal in our protocols, but we do hold our ceremonies and rituals that recognize individuals in our circle of family or events that mark empowerment as being sacred and something to be forever treasured. Although we may be less formal than most with our Intimate Household Family, we absolutely expect other Dominants and Tops, whether head of households/families or not, to respect our family ties, protocols, rituals and traditions. If someone doesn�t know them, they need only to ASK.

As the co-head the House of Shaman and honored to serve as "Mama Keiki" to several in our Intimate Household Family Members, who are considered our �Leather and/or Lifestyle Kids". Daddy Jeff, myself and/or some from our Intimate Household Family Members, from time to time, may also serve in a role of guardianship/protection or mentoring/trainer to others in our Leather and/or Lifestyle Circle of Family, as well as those who become Immediate or Extended Family and close friends. Certainly, Daddy Jeff and I are honored to hold such a role to those we have come to know, love and care for and feel blessed and honored by our wonderful and loving Alternative Leather and Lifestyle Intimate Household Family, as well as the Circle of Family and Friends from around the world. Certainly, I am very proud of the House of Shaman and the Lifestyle Alternatives Artisans Centre [(http://www.lifestylealternatives.org] for being the safe and welcoming havens that they have become over the years (I founded LAAC and direct it as a nonprofit educational and social organization with its own facility) .

As for my "pets", slaves, submissives, or property, I have none at this time and seem to have a real knack for grooming, nurturing and mentoring those who have been my own into wonderful Switches in their own right ^EG^. Perhaps I project my own journey as a Dominant Sadist to Dominate Sadist and Switch Bottom IN REVERSE, because most of those I have taken on as my own have gone from submissive masochist to submissive masochist Switch Top or Dominant. LOL! But you know what they say about the best form of flattery, so I'll take my track record as a huge compliment!

I was formerly the Proud Owner, Nurturing Mistress, Dominant, Sadist, Guardian/Protector and Mentor to SickBoyH2HDD from September 2007 through April 2009. He was the first I have owned after twelve years of not keeping an owned slave. Although the dynamics to our relationship have changed, we are very close, so he still addresses me as Mistress and I still call him My pet. We shall always be part of a loving lifestyle leather household and family together. After Daddy Jeff, SickBoyH2HDD is one of the people I am most proud of knowing and honored to love in my life.

Previous to SickBoyH2HDD, I was the former Proud Mistress, Dominant, Sadist and Guardian/Protector to some wonderful, gentle, and intelligent young men who love to please, are fantastic people with huge hearts, and consistently act with a considerate nature. Back in CA, HI, Europe and early on after moving to FL, well... let's just leave it stating here that I have had many experiences in relationships with some great and not-so-great people, some of whom were with wonderful boys and a few of whom were fantastic girls. I was honored to be Mistress, Dominant, Sadist, Mentor and/or Guardian/Protector to each of them.

Currently, I am in no rush to meet or consider taking anyone on in a formal Dominant and submissive Power Dynamic Exchange Relationship. However, I am open to considering the rare jewel for possibilities with a potential (or probable) submissive or slave who is also a masochist who can go through the paces to develop something that would be long-term and involved commitment. The chemistry and mutual interest must be shared between myself and someone who may capture my interests, along with them having the genuine desire, honest integrity and strong ability to invest the time that it would take to serve and train in order to learn, grow and be nurtured to their fullest potential so that they can experience the rewards for all of their efforts, including, not only my wickedly kinky self, but my love and adoration.

Suffice it to say that I'm a straight up, friendly, happy, tell-it-like-it-is, ethical, honest, sinfully sensual, adventurously deviant, playfully wicked woman and Kinky Tour Guide when it comes to those whom I may have great chemistry and shared interests with. I live openly and embrace life and living, enjoying the many facets of the alternative lifestyle fetishes, kinks and practices that are very near and dear to my heart. And, there's no question that I'm passionate about how I live and love, as well as my family, friends, work and activities. In addition to my family, friends, work, LAAC and the activities hosted each month at the LAAC Facility. I keep busy traveling to the various lifestyle event options that are available whenever possible. You may find me presenting workshops on some of my favorite kinky topics or performing at some of the great events available to alternative lifestyle communities.

If you have questions about other alternative lifestyle activities, events or resources, just ask and I will be happy to help if I can. If you are interested in or have questions about LAAC & Southeast Florida alternative lifestyle events and activities (as well as in the rest of the US), please visit the LAAC Website to view the Calendar of Events OR feel free to contact me directly with questions. I�ll be happy to help you or point you to resources that will.

I also do fetish modeling and photography, as well as business development consulting for the technology industry, wholistic readings/healings, and life/relationship/spiritual coaching for couples, individuals and businesses. If interested in working with me in any of these areas, please feel free to contact me.

In closing, my life is pretty much an open book if you take the time and make the effort to LOOK AND LEARN. I also enjoy meeting and learning about others so that I can expand my connections and friendships in the communities beyond those I am involved in where I live :)

LOOKING FOR POTENTIAL AND POSSIBILITIES IN A "SUBMISSIVE AND MASOCHISTIC SEEKER" WHO IS A RARE JEWEL!

NOTE: If we know each other and participate in the same social networks, have mutual interests, and you think we click enough to want my consideration for more... just skip down to the questions below :) If we DO NOT know each other and you are looking for my consideration as a submissive/masochist in service to me, FIRST THING - please read the following BEFORE getting to the questions below and contacting me:
UPDATED 09/24/2011 - It has become very clear to me that I needed to rethink my requirements for someone whom I may consider inviting to take on.

I have thoughtfully considered just that and this posted update reflects the changes I've decided to make, starting with a requirement for an individual wishing for my consideration to be integrated into some of the areas that are a part of my world, BEFORE the fact and not after...
What in the hell does that mean?
For starters, if someone finds that they have an interest in me taking them on for training and service, they really should "KNOW ME" in person first, right? Well, the best way to do that is for them to - on and of their own accord - step it up and become consistently active (and, even better, involved) in the social networks in which I am involved with and in, specifically the LAAC members, organization, and the events at it's facility. After all, this is where I invest much of my time, focus and energy in. By someone taking the steps to make this happen before any request is made of me for consideration, it also give us time to best get to know each other. Otherwise, it makes no sense at all to me to receive request and begin any consideration process of someone whom I have never met or had any social interaction with.
Make sense?
If so, and you're interested in gaining my consideration, continue reading so you know what I would require of you AND - by all means - start regularly attending events at LAAC so that we can meet and get to know each other enough IN PERSON to see if there's even any mutually shared interests and chemistry between us.
Best case, there is... Worst case, you may meet another Female Dominant that would be perfect for you in my social network in the process!
Those who know me should be able to attest that I'm a nurturer, fun, and devoted to those whom I love and/or care for... Currently, I am open to considering someone for a long-term-relationship that involves Dominance, submission, service, SM, family/household structure, exposure, education, experience, empowerment and possibly more if we matched up well (including, but not limited to, polyamory).

PART ONE

1. Are you looking to be mentored or formally trained as a Top (Sadist), bottom (masochist), Power Dynamics Exchange Relationships (Dominant, submissive, Master/Mistress, Owner, submissive, slave or property) and learn about, explore, as well as experience various aspects alternative lifestyles, leather, polyamory, fetishes and/or kinks?

2. Would you get satisfaction from helping others?

3. Would you enjoy experiencing being part of a community and genuine sense of family belonging?

4. Do you keep your commitments, are you on time, and consider yourself trustworthy (do you do what you say, when you say)?

5. Do you consider yourself to be self-sufficient and reliable?

6. Do you have a job/career and, comfortably, cover your own current living expenses?

7. Would you enjoy the rewards of service to gain information, exposure, education, and experience from the �bottom to the top� (if that�s where you want to end up) AND �serve-to-experience/earn/learn� (�STEEL�) relationship with a Mentor or Trainer (who could also be Dominant and/or Sadist to you if it was mutually agreed to)?

8. Would you be comfortable being in a dedicated relationship to an individual, a couple, and/or a household, as well as - possibly - an organization and its membership that provides you more access to personalized information, exposure, education, and experience through mentoring/training provided?

9. Is serving and earning, as you are learning and growing, a dynamic that you understand and accept as being a "fair trade practice"?

10. Can you commit, at minimum, to 8 hours a week and adhere to a ongoing schedule that is devoted to the above or are you looking for a future live-in situation that embraces the above (for a minimum of 6 months or more)?
Did you answer �YES� to 8 out of 10? s

If no and you are seeking my consideration, we just may not match up well - other than as possible/continuing friends OR further communication and clarifications between us may be necessary for me to gain more insight into what, specifically, you are looking for.

If yes, GREAT! Keep going by providing your detailed responses to the following questions:

PART TWO

A. How would you currently identify yourself, in respect to alternative lifestyles, leather, polyamory, fetishes and kinks, as well as Dominance, submission, Sadism, masochism, being a Kinky Top, kinky bottom, Master/Mistress, slave, Owner, and/or property?

B. What, if any, has been your past mentoring/training, experience and/or interests in, specific to alternative lifestyles, leather, polyamory, fetishes and kinks, as well as Dominance, submission, Sadism, masochism, as a Kinky Top, kinky bottom, Master/Mistress, slave, Owner, and/or or property to date?

C. What are you looking to learn about, experience and grow from personally, specifically and in respect to, alternative lifestyles, leather, polyamory, fetishes and kinks, as well as Dominance, submission, Sadism, masochism, Kinky Top, kinky bottom, Master/Mistress, slave, Owner, and/or property in the future?

D. What are your limitations (soft and hard limits, as well as health/medical issues, challenges or limitations on the physical/mental/emotional levels) that you know of?

E. How do you think you could (or would) best earn the time, attention, and affection, as well as rewards from whomever may become your Mentor/Teacher who could also be your Dominant/Sadist in some capacity?

F. What is it that you find from what you know about me so far (via my profile, writings, and/or any personal contact) that prompted you to request mentoring/training consideration?

G. What alternative lifestyle organizations and/or groups do you belong to, if any?

H. Who are your references from those alternative lifestyle organizations and/or groups, if any?

I. Is there anyone or anything that you must totally avoid that I should know about?

J. What else should I know about you?

PART THREE (Thank you, ShamanAKADaddyJeff for this part in its entirety!)

ANSWER THESE TWO QUESTIONS:

Describe your past or current thoughts, fantasies, and experiences that motivated you to explore �kink�:

What did you hope or expect to find through your explorations?

FINISH THIS STATEMENT:

I contacted you to ask (fill in blank A) and be (fill in blank B) in a formal manner because (fill in blank C).

TRUE OR FALSE?

For me, aspects of alternative lifestyles, leather, polyamory, fetishes and kinks, as well as Dominance, submission, Sadism, masochism, being a Kinky Top, kinky bottom, Master/Mistress, slave, Owner, and/or property:

I. Is mainly about the effect that endorphins have on me.

II. Is mainly about the power/control/submission/surrender dynamics in a relationship.

III. Is mainly erotic and sexual.

IV. Is mainly about senses being heightened.

V. Is mainly about connections and energy.

VI. Is mainly needing to be a mix of the above
(please specify the mix: ________________________________________________).

Feel free to cut and paste the above questions and add your response in a Word document and email it to keiki@houseofshaman.org OR provide it to me through FemDommeSociety or FetLife.

Worst case, by contacting me to express interest in the above, with a consideration request, or specific questions that you may have... you may gain access to meeting others who you can glean knowledge and possibly more from.

Best case, we both get what we seek :)

PLEASE NOTE: If you are into age play, no offense, but I don't think I would be interested. The only exception would be if you make it perfectly clear when you contact me that you are still very much a take charge person outside of your fetish and can run with serving and/or managing projects efficiently and successfully, as well as perform other areas of responsibility in your life or for someone you may be in service to. If that is the case, by all means, please contact me.

Aloha pumehana in love, light, leather, fetishes and kinks,

Domina DeManda
Founder/Director
Lifestyle Alternatives Artisans Centre
Producer - LAC Fetish School and Festival at Fetish Factory's Annual Anniversary Weekends and FF On-Site Attendee and Hotel Liaison
Fetish Factory's Anniversary Weekends
�Mama�s Hula Girl� #372 - Mama's Family
Former Director - Board of Directors
Leather Leadership Conference, Inc.
Domina DeManda - The Kinky Tour Guide's Alternative Lifestyle Biography and Presenter's Resume can be requested by emailing director@lifestylealternatives.org

"In all actions may I search my mind, And as soon as klesha, or delusion, arises, Endangering myself and others, May I firmly face and avert it." Quote by Tenzin Gyatso, His Holiness the Fourteenth Dalai Lama, Winner of the 1989 Nobel Peace Prize